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Theology Debate!

I was having a pleasant conversation the other day with someone who I haven't seen in a while. The subject of Calvinism came up. Without knowing my personal position, this person began to express disdain for people who embrace any form of Calvinism. To which I politely replied, "Well, I'm a Calvinist." After squirming a bit from my unexpected statement, I was smugly asked the following (I assume, rhetorical) question:

"So, which one of your children did God create to go to hell?"

I guess that's supposed to be the ultimate gotcha question from the anti-Calvinist.  I, without hesitation, politely answered, "God does not reveal to us who is elect and who isn't, so I have no idea." My aquaintence squirmed a bit more and replied, "I just know that God does NOT create people just to send them to hell." At this point, to debate further would have made the situation terribly uncomfortable, so I wrapped things up by saying something to the effect of, "people are always going to have disagreements when it comes to the deep matters of theology." The conversation ended amicably, but afterward I myself thinking about what could have been said..


After thinking about both statements, I've come to the conclusion that this person basically is not willing to believe in a God that doesn't match up to their own definition of what's right and fair. I was very tempted to ask this person, "where in the scriptures, do you find support for your statements?" I might have continued, "when I read my bible, it says in Romans chapter 9,
14   What shall we say then ? There is no injustice with God , is there? May it never be! 15 For He says to Moses , “ I WILL HAVE MERCY ON WHOM I HAVE MERCY , AND I WILL HAVE COMPASSION ON WHOM I HAVE COMPASSION .” 16 So then it does not depend on the man who wills or the man who runs, but on God who has mercy. ... 21 Or does not the potter have a right over the clay, to make from the same lump one vessel for honorable use and another for common use? 22  What if God, although willing to demonstrate His wrath and to make His power known, endured with much patience vessels of wrath prepared for destruction? 23 And He did so to make known the riches of His glory upon vessels of mercy, which He prepared beforehand for glory, 24 even us, whom He also called.
So, according to scripture, the only conclusion that can honestly be drawn from this text is that God, in fact, creates some for destruction, and some to show mercy.  According to the inspired author, to argue with this truth is as absurd as telling a potter that he has no right to do what he wants with his pile of clay. This is as plain as anything written in scripture, yet a clear argument from scripture has no effect on someone whose theology comes from their own thoughts and reasoning. This person wants to make God into the image they want...and that's just good old fashioned idolatry!

Did God create my children to go to hell?

I don't know. I certainly hope not. Here's what I do know. I am responsible to proclaim the gospel to my children until they die or are born again. I will raise them up in the admonition of the Lord, I will pray daily for their salvation, and I will do my best to show Christ to my family by the life I live. I rest easy knowing that is all that God expects of me.  Their salvation is not in my hands, and according the only authority (God's Word), ultimately it's not in their's either.
Romans 10:20 And Isaiah is very bold and says , “ I WAS FOUND BY THOSE WHO DID NOT SEEK ME, I BECAME MANIFEST TO THOSE WHO DID NOT ASK FOR ME.”
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